Most people don't know what today is, or find it significant in any way. I find myself wishing that they did. It's probably selfish, but I want everyone to know the kind of person my little brother was, so that on this day, maybe they will remember that they were robbed just as much as I was. He was the kind of person everyone's lives were better for knowing.
Nicholas Allen Miller was born on January 4th, 1991. His favorite color, fiercely guarded, was blue, and his favorite thing to do was laugh until you had no choice but to laugh with him. He loved his family, and was without a doubt my great-grandmother's favorite person in the world. He was tiny, frail, and cute, with a huge heart and equally huge smile. He was the bravest person I've ever met and probably the most full of life.
For some reason, his role models included Steve Urkel and Jim Carrey. I actually found a picture of Jim Carrey around Nikki's age and was stricken by the resemblance. He loved books, writing, drawing, and Winnie the Pooh. His favorite thing to do was use his mind and play. He liked jokes and pranks, and delighted in our annoyance as well as our genuine pleasure and affection. He had his troubles, but I'm not thinking about those today. I'm thinking about his love.
He loved preschool and kindergarten, and when he was learning to write his name we would find it everywhere. He steamed through every day, no matter how full of pain it was, with the determination to keep on smiling and believe that the next day, no, the next moment, would be better than ever. He knew how to believe in the good in the world, and his optimism and faith make him one of the people I look up to the most.
No matter how hard things got, he knew that the good was always going to outweigh the bad, no matter how short-lived that good moment was. It is enough to have a single, tiny good moment in the day, and if you hold onto that, all the bad in the world can melt away and seem like nothing. That's the kind of person I want to be, and I think that, no matter where his soul may be, he is proud of me for making the choice to try living his philosophy. And maybe, someday, through me and the people who know who he is, our words and experience can help lift someone else out of darkness and show them what Nick, and now I, know: That suffering means nothing. You have to let it go and remember that the next good moment is yet to come, and if it doesn't come to you, you better make it for yourself.
Nicholas Allen Miller was born on January 4th, 1991. His favorite color, fiercely guarded, was blue, and his favorite thing to do was laugh until you had no choice but to laugh with him. He loved his family, and was without a doubt my great-grandmother's favorite person in the world. He was tiny, frail, and cute, with a huge heart and equally huge smile. He was the bravest person I've ever met and probably the most full of life.
For some reason, his role models included Steve Urkel and Jim Carrey. I actually found a picture of Jim Carrey around Nikki's age and was stricken by the resemblance. He loved books, writing, drawing, and Winnie the Pooh. His favorite thing to do was use his mind and play. He liked jokes and pranks, and delighted in our annoyance as well as our genuine pleasure and affection. He had his troubles, but I'm not thinking about those today. I'm thinking about his love.
He loved preschool and kindergarten, and when he was learning to write his name we would find it everywhere. He steamed through every day, no matter how full of pain it was, with the determination to keep on smiling and believe that the next day, no, the next moment, would be better than ever. He knew how to believe in the good in the world, and his optimism and faith make him one of the people I look up to the most.
No matter how hard things got, he knew that the good was always going to outweigh the bad, no matter how short-lived that good moment was. It is enough to have a single, tiny good moment in the day, and if you hold onto that, all the bad in the world can melt away and seem like nothing. That's the kind of person I want to be, and I think that, no matter where his soul may be, he is proud of me for making the choice to try living his philosophy. And maybe, someday, through me and the people who know who he is, our words and experience can help lift someone else out of darkness and show them what Nick, and now I, know: That suffering means nothing. You have to let it go and remember that the next good moment is yet to come, and if it doesn't come to you, you better make it for yourself.